Viet Nam | lessons in irreverence

things not to make merry about while in Viet Nam:

• Ho Chi Minh's mausoleum

  ...or your patriotic taxi driver might drop you off at the exit end of the gated 5 acre enclosure 10 minutes before closing

• family planning

  ...procreating is a serious matter that involves your goddesses, your ancestors, your kin, and the government (official VN policy is that women are sanctioned to have no more than two children, between the ages of 24-35.)

• innuendos (when around elders)

  ...elders are very, very, very earnest. bawdy humor is best left amongst vinamese peers.

• how many wives your uncle-in-law has

  ...particularly when he has two

• matchmaking

  ...funny for you, crushed expectations for your little stars & stripey-eyed cousin

• what ethnicity your beau is

  ...make one small joke to one person about 1/32nd and sheesh, seven years later all fourscore and seven of 'em think its gospel and every single detail is just confirmation

• what kind of meat you want for dinner

  mmm...mouse in point