diaper free!

we've been doing elimination communication with VL consistently since she was 3.5 months old. within a few days she was happily pooing almost exclusively on the potty (only misses were when we were in the car or when we were making dinner/doing chores & not paying attention). thing is she doesn't want to soil herself, so she'll hold out and try to get attention as long as she can before resignedly & involuntarily going in her diaper. so because she was offered the potty for pooing she went all at once instead of pooping herself a little and then holding in the rest, to be repeated 2-3 times a day.

this last month or so at the encouragement of her Bà Nội|paternal grandmother, we've been giving her diaper-free time as long as we're home & around her. it helps that its summer and being naked butt isnt too big of a deal. (though i did i finally break down & bought baby leg warmers when i accepted that i wasn't going to knit any anytime soon in spite of my purty stash). we just put her on the potty before & after napping, before & after nursing, and when ever she's squirmy and every 20-30 minutes or so. yes, there have been misses. she's peed on me twice, on her padded play area, on her Bà Nội. but y'know, it's only pee. Mr. Darcy did not break up with me; the world did not come crashing down. we change her and change ourselves and live to tell the tale.

at nighttime, we leave the diaper on and she's been down to three then two pees a night. and sometimes when i'm too tired to even wake up when she attaches herself to my boob, i let her sleep the night with a wet diaper. i tried pottying her at night and it was exhausting. i was 3am clumsy. she cried at some new routine being introduced to her sleeptime, being somewhat woken up by the naked butt, ceiling fan breeze (heatwave) and sitting up on the potty bit. so i haven't tried that again, though if her eyes pop open and she smiles, i may try it if i have the energy. its better than changing a diaper on the other side of it.

the nice thing about being naked butt is that her clothes fit better (though baggy on the bum) since most american baby clothes nowadays are designed for disposable diapers and cloth diapers are considerably bulkier even though the biobottoms bikini cut wool diaper covers that we use (and love!) are very trim. i met VL's doppelganger who is three days younger the other day and i was utterly fascinated that she was wearing fitted leggings that weren't rolled up on the cuffs or highwater waists (because they are a size or two up). i poked at her butt and asked her mom, is she wearing panties? no, she was wearing a disposable. i had to laugh at how skewed my perspective on baby bottoms has become. VL is my norm. though i will say in the last month, VL's little tush has become juicy, as has her thighs, arms, belly, cheeks, well all over really. she is just pure juicy-ness.

anyways we cancelled the diaper service a few weeks ago and go through about 30 cloth diapers a week. mostly during the day when the nanny has her. so we've finally achieved that zen balance of owning your own diapers. and its nice to know that next baby, we won't have to put in as much moola top start off.

so last night, big milestone, she didn't pee in her diaper all night! she held it, and my timing was on. as soon as she started to stir, i took off her diaper and put her on the potty and boy did she happily pee. she held it almost 12 hours! talk about supreme willpower. i can't even hold it at night anymore. anyways, as pleased as i am about this, this is her own achievement for herself. we try not to praise her for peeing & pooing because a) she doesn't need to be trained to be a people pleaser and b) bodily functions are utterly natural and not needing of praise anymore than breathing and blinking deserve praise.

i was reading meditations for new mothers and came across one that really resonated with me about children asserting their independence, sometimes defiantly. the gist is that you shouldn't let your own fears become the challenges & limits that your child has to surmount in order to lead her/his life. getting over the fear of her pooping or peeing on her clothes, on me, on the floor, wherever, was really a big barrier for me intially and why i didn't start pottying until three months in (though i've been cueing since birth), even though i was mentally committed to it. and now that we are on the other side of it, i can see how my fear held me back, held her back. why should she have to sit in pee or poo all this time because i am afraid of getting my clothes soiled? my clothes are washable, and are not so valuable that making my baby soil herself is more important. it helps of course that we have hardwood floors. as for the wool rug, well, wool absorbs pee & makes it into anti-bacterial soap. i think after having to deal with washing dirty cloth diapers with my amish washer and handscrubbing the diaper covers, it makes me a little more practical and less squeamish when it comes to what comes out of my baby. i say that now, before she has started solids.

next stop: tiny baby panties! go VL!